Giving.

Thanks for making my lonely day a little bit better. 

Sometimes.

Having one of those lonely bouts. Wishing I could just talk to someone, say how my day was, what I did, what I was planning to do. Even for just ten mins, to have someone care about what I had to say. Feeling like this is beyond a need for calling my mom and bothering her. I'm sure this is just a passing feeling but it's a feeling none the less. 

Barking.

Waking up every hour. 

Finally I sleep hard enough to have a dream. 

Wake up an hour later angry. 

I'm exhausted. 

Pouring.

So much has been going on and yet, not really. I've missed so much work, I need to not miss anymore time. I've cleaned out my savings and I am literally living off sandwiches. But I don't regret moving, at all. Everyday I wake up to a furniture-less apartment and it doesn't bother me. Cause I know for a fact I did the right thing. People tell me I seem happier and I smile more. It feels like a weight has been lifted and I can say/do what I feel like doing, not cause I was afraid of what you would say or find out. Come to think about it, I haven't even really thought about you. The way you acted left such a sour taste in my mouth that I'm glad you felt like shit afterwards. You know how I know? I was checking the mail at the house saw the hospital bill. I know for a fact you're on meds again. I bet it hurts knowing all these years that weed was just a crutch for something you really needed to take care of. Maybe you won't go psycho on the next girlfriend you try to control. 

Sorry for the tangent. 

But yeah I'm so glad to be out of there, just me and my kitties <3